I am a puppet on a string
  I am the worst thing worst thing you've ever seen
  I am impossible to believe
  I'm pulled by gravity shocked by my depravity
  I'm irrational I'm illogical hypocritical a bleeding heart liberal
  I'm an alien dressed like Gideon I'm a malcontent
  a thorough modern idiot watch me as I fall
  I am humble I am vain
  what motivates me something I can't explain
  I am outrageous and insane
  I'm fueled by gasoline, alcohol and nicotine
  I'm an honest hypocrite imploding modern idiot
  I am a slave to my abuse convicted caught with no excuse
  I'm pathetic apathetic disillusioned disconnected
  I am lost I am free I'm impossible to believe
  a walking chemical statistically impossible
  a thorough modern idiot watch me as I fall