Your sisters so cool she goes to university
  Your brothers got it sussed he takes biology
  Your dads not a criminal he's part of the economy
  Your mums not invisible she's knows about philosophy
    And it's so sad
  The way they have to be like that to me
  And it's so sad
  The way you had to leave the family
    You like to have a row it's part of your vocabulary
  You talk about love like you're gonna win the lottery
  You've got it all planned like daylight robbery
  Your friends just say he's such a cheeky monkey
    And it's so sad
  The way they have to be like that to me
  And it's so sad
  The way you had to leave the family
    How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend
  How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend
    You talk about the stars like a hippy on celery
  I'll do the washing up and you can play monopoly
  It's such an opportunity for you to start photography
  I ain't going there it's out of my geography
    And it's so sad
  The way they have to be like that to me
  And it's so sad
  The way you had to leave the family
    How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend
  How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend
  How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend
  How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend
    You go on about that bloke like you wanna marry him
  He's always getting drunk and I have to carry him
  But what's a name she has to take the blame
  I only want a laugh but here we go again
    And it's so sad
  The way they have to be like that to me
  And it's so sad
  The way you had to leave the family
    How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend
  How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend
  How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend
  How long have you been my girlfriend, girlfriend