[sound of match striking]
    Know that it would be untrue
  Know that I would be a liar
  If I was to say to you
  I didn't set your house on fire
    But it's just the way I am
  Have to take it for a fact
  Life can really burn you up
  When you're a pyromaniac
  So...
    If you love somebody
  Better set them on fire
    I went to your house last night
  Dad called me the human torch
  Got a little pissed at him
  So I burned down your front porch
    Now I feel a little better
  About throwin' gas on your dad
  But you know it's hard to quit
  And besides he started it
    I just bought a brand new lighter
  And I just can't wait to use it
  With a can a' kerosene it's lots a' fun
  You can't refuse it
    Oily rags are special things
  You know to me they're diamond rings
  Maybe we can have some fun
  Maybe we can burn someone
  So...
    If you love somebody
  Better set them on fire
    Know that it would be untrue
  Know that I would be a liar
  If I was to say to you
  I didn't set your dad on fire
    If you love somebody
  Better set them on fire
    If you love somebody
  Why not set them on fire?
    If you love somebody
  Better set them on fire
    If you love somebody
  Why not set them on fire?