You shouldn't judge a man by the hair on his butt.
  Maybe it's like needles
  Or possibly like bark
  Does it need to be mowed
  Like the lawn at the park?
  Maybe it's too soft
  Or possibly too coarse.
  You stuck your hands down his pants
  You though he was a horse.
  Maybe it's light blonde
  But probably it's black.
  It streached from his belt
  And covers up his back.
  I saw he had it braided.
  It made his pants real snug.
  It covers up his butt cheeks like a rug.
  Maybe it's like a forest
  All covered up with trees
  Maybe when he farts
  His butt hairs blow in the breeze.
  Maybe you were frightened because it was so scary
  Or maybe you found out it was filled with dingle berries.