"This isn't the stuff we normally do for you guys that are buying this. This is what happens when you consume massive amounts of drugs and alcohol"
  
   My mother was a douche bag
   My sister was a douche bag
   I guess that makes me one too
  
   I got the douche bag blues
   I got the douche bag blues
   I got the douche bag blues
   Lord I just don't know what to do
  
   I sold dynamite to the Arabs
   Bullets to the Jews
   Whiskey to the Indians
   And I'll get you too
  
   I got the douche bag blues
   I got the douche bag blues
   I got the douche bag blues
   Lord I just don't know what to do
  
   Vinegar and water
   The drink that I choose
   I gotta tell ya brother
   Tastes like pussy juice
  
   Time flies when you're in a coma...